Author Archives: Dan Thurot
Taking a Swig of Hemloch
Hemloch’s Horned Advisor advises you to play Hemloch, lest you get the horns.
The more astute among you have probably picked up on the fact that I prefer board games of the epic variety, and what little crevice I have in my heart for two-player card duelers has already been stubbornly occupied by Summoner Wars. And yet, there’s something about Hemloch from Small Box Games that has captured my imagination. Not only is their company delightfully and intentionally tiny (you can read about it over here), but John Clowdus has a way of filling even the slightest games with an immense range of compelling choices.
Imagine this: The end of an age of twilight is dawning over the city of Hemloch, and as the last member of an ancient bloodline you’ll need to manipulate, influence, cajole, bribe, and backstab to gain the allegiance of the city’s districts before the sun rises. And you’ll be doing it in about twenty to thirty minutes.
A Space-Biff! Secret Annoucement!
I made this image. Hoo yeah baby.
Alright people, rub your hands together and shake the sleepy out of your buttocks, because Space-Biff! has an announcement. “What kind of announcement?” I can hear you asking, even though you’re in Hungary and I’m locked tight in the basement of the SB! Commune. Well, it’s the kind of announcement that you’ll be thinking about for days; that will challenge your preconceptions of what “announcement” can mean; that will replace Benjamin Disraeli as the eighteenth-coolest thing in history. And it makes us kind of a tease.
The Guts of Metro 2033 (Act Four)
A brief glimpse of the splendor of Polis.
Act Four begins with Artyom successfully completing his original mission to reach Polis and tell them about the Dark Ones that are invading his home station. We know this can’t be the end of Artyom’s story, not only because then the game would have been shockingly short and lacked any real endgame climax, but because the opening scene of the game was of a desperate windswept battle against a horde of mutants at the base of a mysterious tower. Act Four is all about getting Artyom there. It’s the closest thing Metro 2033 has to a “filler” chapter, and even then there are still plenty of disturbing secrets to unearth and dreadful locations to visit.
RPS Ascension: The Index
Antopeos
RPS Ascension, the game of Dominions 3: The Awakening as played by a handful of forumites from Rock, Paper, Shotgun, has finally come to an end. The early parts were some of the first articles I wrote here on Space-Biff!, so please forgive some of the rougher sections. I could go back and touch them up, but that sounds a lot like effort.
Unfortunately, the game didn’t end as we would have hoped—a broken PC and waning interest caused a couple players to drop out prematurely, as is sometimes the problem with Dom3. Still, it was an excellent game, and whoever won (I’m not 100% clear on that, actually. All I know is that I lost) certainly deserved it.
After the jump, the complete index.
RPS Ascension: Ignominy
The Sauromatian army at Vlecz.
Did I mention that I, Ichiro, was once the Prophet of the cyclops-god? I suspect not—it is the supremest of punishments to play both the roles of Prophet and Last Believer. At any rate, it is right that you should know why I have been chosen to tell this last chapter of the tale of the greatest alliance of shunned creatures that Antopeos has ever known. We stood upon the fields of Vlecz, far from the Fissure of Yomi, and witnessed the brutality of man. And now I am their guest, kept alive for the sole purpose of regaling their guests and striking fear into the hearts of those who dare resist them.
Aition Agitation: Babel Rising
God smites some Shinarites.
Marketing people! Listen closely, because I’m going to tell you the secret of how to make me powerless against your advertising schemes! Here’s what you do: take your game—any game, really—and slap a glossy religious theme on top of your broken mechanics, tedious gameplay, and repetitive design, and I will lap it up in hopes that you’ve just created one of the few videogames ever to present an interesting take on religion.
On an unrelated note, Ubisoft and Mondo Production recently released Babel Rising on PC. What did I think of it? Find out, after the jump.
The Heart of Metro 2033 (Act Three)
A commissar’s idea of asking for volunteers.
I believe that each of Metro 2033’s five acts has a distinct goal. The first introduced us to the Moscow Metro and informed us that humanity isn’t going to be improving their quality of life anytime soon, and the second battered us over the head what sounded a lot like a theme. The third does something else: armed (hopefully) with what you learned from Act 2 (if you were listening), Act 3 is all about testing the state of Artyom’s heart (and, by extension, yours). I’ll explain.
The Duration of Death: In Ruins
Standing on the shore of a pale city.
“By protracting life, we do not deduct one jot from the duration of death.”
—Lucretius, “On the Nature of Things,” Book III, line 1087
Back in January I wrote about a story-light but emotion-heavy game called The Snowfield. It was such an oppressive experience (I mean this as a compliment) that I never managed to “finish” it, if such a thing can ever really be finished, even though it nagged at me for days. After eight months, another student project has caught my eye. This time it’s In Ruins from Tom Betts, a haunting twenty-minute expedition that’s both part of his research for his PhD and a prototype for the procedural generation that will be seen in the upcoming Sir, You Are Being Hunted by Big Robot.
I recommend you give it a try before reading on.
RPS Ascension: The Mystery of the Disappearing Pretenders
The Yomi conquer the lands of the Marverni tribes.
Listen well, and I well tell you a tale. It is the story of how the Ascension Wars came to end; of six great Pretenders that sought to sit upon the absent Pantokrator’s throne; and how I, Ichiro, came to be the last surviving Oni on the face of Antopeos.
Like any true story, it must be told in parts, and it is much larger than any one teller. As for the first: I can speak what I know in two nights, for I have been assured that the early years of the Yomi Kingdom have been chronicled elsewhere. And as for the second: I have but narrow insight into the whole of the tale, and my limited vision will have to suffice.
SB! Presents: The Staff Page
Wee Aquinas, one of the beloved SB! staff. Also the head union agitator.
Well, this has been a long time coming. I’ve been informed by the rest of the staff that I am the “attention hog” of Space-Biff! And you know what? They’re right. So I’ve caved to their demands for a Staff page. You can find it here.
Read all about it after the jump.
SPACE-BIFF! 