Author Archives: Dan Thurot
Streets Slick with Neon and Lies
Until last Friday, I’d always wanted to visit Hong Kong. Then there were four totally unrelated murders within an hour of each other. One of them went unsolved. The other three had all been carried out by police officers.
Yikes.
Pandemic: Spoiled Friendships
According to the Surgeon General, spoilers can be bad for you, and may cause mood swings, irrationality, sleepless nights, and “getting bent out of shape.” Soon after issuing this warning, the Surgeon General fired her undersecretary for putting such a frivolous motion across her desk. Personally, we think the Surgeon General can stuff it, so what follows is part three of our series to demystify everything about Pandemic Legacy. Our only warning is to take care that you’re caught up on part one and part two before reading further!
EVEN SO, BE WARNED THAT THERE ARE MANY SPOILERS HERE. PARTAKE AT YOUR OWN RISK. SPACE-BIFF! WILL NOT REIMBURSE YOU FOR HURT FEELINGS OR BENT-OUT-OF-SHAPENESS.
Posthummus
It’s the nature of children to kill their parents. I’ve come to terms with this, which is why Baby Cate has already received the best firearms, outdoor survival, and martial arts training available to two-year-olds. For a premium, anything is possible. And when the time comes, I’ll put up a noble fight.
Which is perhaps why Posthuman stands out in spite of itself.
Empires: Age of Taking Stuff
Our modern sensibilities may protest all they like, but it’s a fact of human nature that we as a species absolutely love the prospect of racing headlong into the unknown, finding people dissimilar to ourselves, and swiping all their stuff. And Empires: Age of Discovery, the spiritual reincarnation (and license sidestep) of Glen Drover’s 2007 board game Age of Empires III: The Age of Discovery, understands this fact deep down in the pit of its belly.
The Dice Must Flow
While other pubescent boys were discovering their interest in girls, my heart was occupied by Dune. Without reservation, it was my favorite book between the ages of fourteen and eighteen. Too bad about most of the sequels, not to mention every attempt to translate onto the big screen.
A couple months ago, the first time Dune: The Dice Game (also known by its much cooler nickname The Dice Must Flow) hit my table, a newcomer to our group announced that he’d never read Frank Herbert’s 1965 masterpiece. Somewhat interrupting my explanation of the rules, he asked, “So what’s it about?”
There’s a chance I was a bit curt in my response. I think I mumbled something about Lawrence of Arabia and went back to explaining how to play. Because anyway, what is Dune about? There are any number of things I could have said. It’s about the allure and danger of messiahs and heroes. About addiction to a dwindling resource. About the decline of the status quo, about revolution, about religion’s role in both. The transformative nature of knowledge, violence, sex. It’s about finding yourself and realizing you’ve lost yourself in the process.
Or maybe those are just the memory of my teenage hormones talking. Lots of things seem double-plus profound when your pituitary gland has declared war on the rest of your body.
Elsewhere: Raid & Trade
It isn’t often that I play truly terrible games. For the most part, my personal filter has seen enough use that it strains out the turds before they ever land on my table, like a sieve umbrella that keeps my hat smear-free. Also in this metaphor, it rains poo.
Unfortunately, every so often a wet one trumpets through the net. This time it was Raid & Trade, one of the dullest games that has ever besotted my living room. My review can be found over at Miniature Market’s Review Corner. It’s perhaps my most openly negative critique in a long time — frankly, I’m surprised they agreed to publish it. If you do take a look, take note of the unintentional hilarity to be found after the article’s conclusion.
Best Week 2015: The Index
Once again that sad moment is upon us. Best Week 2015 is over, leaving us with nothing to do but say goodbye. Below are links to each day’s catalog of the best games of the year. Just click any of the pics to be magically whisked away to the correct list. Until 2016’s compilation, take care of yourselves!
Best Week 2015, Left Over!
Some games simply can’t be categorized, especially when the categories are as subjective as Best Week 2015’s have been. To make sure all the greatest games of the year get their due, what follows are the best that didn’t quite fit anywhere else.
Best Week 2015, Surprised!
I’m not one for complaining about my moonlighting as a critic. Mostly because it always comes across as sort of “I play too many games, it’s so hard. So hard! How can anyone even begin to comprehend my plight? Nobody but me can write these words, nobody.”
On the other hand, my life is super hard & stuff. For example, when you play well over a hundred new games every year, some of the sheen will inevitably wear off. Which is why a particularly good game — one I didn’t see coming — can be such a delight. Here are ten examples.
Best Week 2015, Overlooked!
With so many games releasing each year, it’s inevitable that some of the best will slip through the cracks. Today is about those lost souls, the bright crazy children who dwell at the periphery.
Of course, the danger of not paying all that much attention to the prevailing hotness is that I could be completely wrong about some of these. For all I know, this might as well be a list of the ten most popular games of the year. My only criteria are: one, that the games in question must be superb, and two, that I haven’t heard much about them.
SPACE-BIFF! 