A Plea from Space-Biff!
When I decided to start writing Space-Biff! it was for one of those “just because” reasons. It was meant as an outlet for things that interest me, and I never intended to use it as a soapbox. But you may have heard of the Stop Online Piracy Act or the Protect IP Act (the links lead to their full texts). If not, I’d recommend a couple of short reads, or a look at their respective Wikipedia pages. If that’s too much effort, then there’s a just-over-four-minute video after the jump. Please take a look.
Don’t Trip: Running with Rifles
Many green men running. Running with rifles. (You may need to click for bigger. They're small men).
I have two secret talents. One of them is that I can fall asleep anywhere and anywhen. The other is that I’m pretty good at following through on my New Year’s Resolutions. I made three this year. Two of them are dull—you know, weight loss dull. But the exciting one is that I’ve determined that I’m going to update Space-Biff! with much more regularity. I’ve already got a bunch of great stuff planned for this and next month, and all I have to do is beat L.A. Noire, remember what happened twenty turns ago in the RPS Dominions 3 game, and contract another disease in Skyrim. Today was MLK Day, so I had all day free to work on these things.
Instead I spent all day playing Running with Rifles by Modulaatio Games. Day wasted? I think not.
Gears of War: The Board Game: The Review (Part 2)
Our attempt at an over-the-shoulder shot, just like from the PC game. This is, incidentally, the one moment where weenie-man Damon Baird attempts something heroic. I'm sure he missed the shot.
“C’mon Baird! A little bit of this is good for you! Builds your immune system.”
—Augustus “Cole Train” Cole, Gears of War
In part 1, I outlined the three things that stand out to me as the advantages of Gears of War: The Board Game, the latest from Corey Konieczka and Fantasy Flight Games. I’d recommend reading that first, because this is the segment where I talk about the game’s three disadvantages. Now, before I get into that, I’d like to say that for some folks these might be totally negligible. I enjoyed the game, and thought a few of the mechanics were especially smart. However, I wouldn’t recommend a purchase without a prospective buyer knowing a few things.
So here we go!
Gears of War: The Board Game: The Review (Part 1)
Dominic Santiago finds himself swarmed by wretches in Gears of War: The Board Game.
“Yeah! Wooo! Bring it on, sucka! This is my kinda shit!”
— Augustus “Cole Train” Cole, Gears of War
Corey Konieczka is one of only four board game designers whose names I’m capable of recognizing immediately. He’s designed some of my favorite games, such as Battlestar Galactica, Runewars, and Mansions of Madness—the last of which I’ve talked about at length here on Space-Biff! before. He’s also designed some other well-received games like Descent: Journeys in the Dark, Space Hulk: Death Angel, and Starcraft. As such, when one of my friends proposed Mr Konieczka’s recent Gears of War: The Board Game for our next game night, I didn’t require much convincing.
The verdict? Find the first half after the jump.
Darkest of Reviews
The Romans brought shields as a distraction for the gravity gun. To their dismay, it was not a gravity gun at all.
I received an unexpected gift for Christmas, courtesy of my friend J.B. / digital_pariah, who you may remember as one of the players from our RPS Ascension game of Dominions 3 (which I am terribly behind in talking about here on Space-Biff!). It was the time-traveling romp Darkest of Days, a game about anachronisms that strikes me as an anachronism itself. It’s a much-ignored gem from 2009 that, for the most part, looks as though it has arrived on your PC after an arduous time-bending adventure, in which a serviceable gaming engine from 2008 stole the discarded textures of 2005, kidnapped Harry Turtledove’s doppelganger to pen the plot, and then decided on a pit stop in 1862 to get the Battle of Antietam just right.
Any game that channels that one good part from Timecop is a game in which I’m interested, and it’s fair to say I was looking forward to Darkest of Days in the same kind of way that I used to look forward to having my modern army men gun down my pirate Legos (read: very much). I didn’t expect it to spin me around and teach me a life lesson (or at least try really, really hard to). The review, in three parts, follows.
A Plaguebearer in Skyrim: The Epiphany
The base of Northwind Summit, rumored nest of a dragon.
(Before reading, you should read the first part of our heroes’ adventures. It’s right here.)
Illia continues to be worried about Innohunk as they near Northwind Summit, the northernmost peak in the Rift. It is a lawless region, barely overseen by its jarl in the capital of Riften. It is populated with bears, wolves, bandits, and, if the rumors prove true (they almost always do in Tamriel), dragons. If anything ill should befall them, there will be no help, as nearest civilization is either the unprotected mining camp of Darkwater Crossing on the river to the west, or the city of Windhelm across miles of desolate marshes to the north. That is to say, only weeks ago Innohunk would have been reveling in the danger of their quest. Today he is as gloomy as the Northwind mountains.
Illia has had a witchly premonition (though she quietly disclaims that she is not a witch, not anymore) that the source of Innohunk’s bleak mood will be revealed this very day. The anticipation is killing her.
Christmas, Occupied
After years of not being played with, my old Star Wars toys were sick of the annual use that the Christmas crowd was getting. They’ve taken matters into their own hands. Take that, ornament fat cats!
They're as mad as hell, and they're not going to take this anymore.
Disclaimer: This is what I did with my sister while everyone else was dipping chocolates. This isn’t meant as a statement of political alignment, etc, etc.
More pics after the jump, and of course, you are permitted to click any of the pics for embiggening.
A Plaguebearer in Skyrim: Meet the Dragonborn
Innohunk is so heroic, he blacksmiths in plate. Doesn't even feel the heat.
Meet Innohunk.
Innohunk is the Dovahkiin, or Dragonborn. This means he’s got a capital-d Destiny. As such, he’s one of the most talented men in all of Skyrim — nay, all of Tamriel! Everyone wants him to solve their problems. Women want a peek of what’s under his mail skirt, and men want to die by his side. He’s amassed so much treasure that his eventual barrow will be looted for centuries to come. Basically, he’s got everything a red-blooded Nord man could ask for.
So why does Innohunk look so sad?
Rage: The Monocular
Back when I quasi-reviewed Rage, I was going to write another pair of articles. These articles would be lists, formatted along the lines of “The 5 Things Rage Got Right” and “The 5 Things Rage Got Wrong.” Very cleverly, I was planning on writing that the number one thing that id got both right and wrong was the game engine, id Tech 5. I know, herp de derp.
It’s been a great week for game releases, what with both Skyrim and Saints Row: The Third coming out and flustering my time management. Both are so immense that I doubt I’ll be able to do them justice anytime soon. So I sat down to make a little filler article. To keep up the habit, you see. I figured I’d talk about a few of my criticisms of Rage that I left unvoiced back in October.
Then I got completely sidetracked, and found myself wearing strange clothes and feeling not quite myself.
Mansions of Madness: Blood Ties (Part 3)
Last time on Mansions of Madness: Blood Ties...
That is not dead which can eternal lie,
and with strange aeons even death may die.
— H.P. Lovecraft, “The Call of Cthulhu”
When last we saw our investigators, things weren’t going well. You should read all about that before continuing on (Part 1, Part 2) . “Ashcan” Pete’s uncle Artimus has made some sort of black bargain, and now that he’s died it’s blowing back Ashcan’s way (“Just my luck,” he mutters repeatedly), who is now trapped between a mi-go and a zombie. Professor Harvey Walters has contracted an otherworldly case of kleptomania. Kate Winthrop and Sister Mary were ambushed by a very suspiciously quiet zombie, and now they’re hiding out in the house at the north of Artimus’ estate.
Is this the end for our ragged band?
SPACE-BIFF! 