Summoner Wars Mega #2: Vanguards vs. Mercenaries
Vanguards versus Mercenaries.
Today’s battle is something of a class war. The sprawling (and smelly) City of Heap has long stood in the shadow of the Citadel of the Fist, home to the Vanguards, but at long last Rallul’s Mercenary company, which often recruits out of Heap’s slums, has challenged young Sera Eldwyn to a battle for ultimate control! Or at least control for a while, since the Summoner Wars are functionally unending.
This match couldn’t have been more different from our last one if it tried. Rather than being full of trickery and win-stealing, this one was all about two forces slowly grinding each other into dust. And I’ll tell you now, it was a close one.
Board Games & Me: Forbidden Bridge
Forbidden Bridge, the jewel of 1992.
After being bored out of our minds retrying Risk last week, I promised this time we would play something fun — and I’m making good on that promise with Forbidden Bridge, the first board game I ever begged my dad to get for Christmas (I think I asked for the Game of Life a few years earlier, but we’re going to pretend that never happened. We only played it twice, so it functionally didn’t).
Forbidden Bridge is amazing, despite not being that great a game. I’ll explain why.
Summoner Wars Mega #1: Mountain Vargath vs. Jungle Elves
Mountain Vargath versus Jungle Elves.
Today the stout Mountain Vargath will face off against the mobile Jungle Elves. This matchup probably wouldn’t even occur if the lore of Summoner Wars were ironclad, since both factions are only fighting to defend their homeland. Ah well, maybe there’s a tract of mountainous jungle somewhere that everyone lays claim to. The Itharian Poland or something.
This match caught us both by surprise. It was surprisingly nonviolent, though it lasted fewer than 10 full rounds. Neither faction managed to get through their entire deck, and nobody was sure who would win until the very last dice roll.
Race to the Meuse
Much like the elusive okapi, good strategy games are hard to come by on the iPad. How many times do developers think we want to sit through bad Advance Wars clones anyway? So the release of Shenandoah Studio’s Battle of the Bulge has been a breath of fresh air in a stale warehouse. This week I played the three-day introductory scenario, Race to the Meuse. Did I take Bastogne? Did I reach the Meuse River itself? Find out below.
Board Games & Me: Risk
The family’s 1980s version of Risk.
Hi there, friendly reader. Today I’m inaugurating a short series about the games that instilled me with my current love of boardgaming, and about trying them again years later. Be warned that these aren’t necessarily the most interesting games, or even particularly good games — today’s article is about Risk, for instance, which is neither.
“So why talk about it then?” Good question! I have a good answer to go with it: Because Risk was the first game I ever longed to play. And when I finally did, it taught me something important about the power of board games.
Upcoming: Summoner Wars Mega
Inspired by Space-Biff! friend Digital Pariah, who’s been battling his way through his Summoner Wars collection one faction at a time and making me jealous with all manner of fascinating tales, the wife and I have decided to follow suit. Beginning next Monday, we’ll be posting weekly Summoner Wars battle reports in addition to our regular programming. Details below.
The Top Five Impactful Games of 2012
I don’t think there can be any question that we’re living through a genuine Golden Age of Gaming when picking out the most impactful games of the year is difficult, not because I need to invent tenuous reasons to validate my choices, but because there are too many to choose from. I’ve whittled down the list, and what follows are the five games that most affected me in 2012. And boy, there were some doozies.
Teleglitch Takes Me Back
I don’t know if there’s a name for that type of question that members of the same generation ask each other — things like “Where were you when JFK was shot?” or “when Sputnik went up?” or “when the Wall came down?” — ones that give folks a feel for each other, that establish they’ve lived through the same tragedies and triumphs, like a person’s rough backstory is encapsulated in the answers. I like those questions. Sometimes it’s good to know we come from the same place.
I came along too early for my question to be about 9/11 and too late for anything with Cold War flavoring. “Where were you when Clinton was re-elected?” doesn’t have much ring to it, though I can answer it (kitchen). I’m having a hard time thinking of anything else I could use. Oh, maybe Clinton’s impeachment. I was in the kitchen for that too.
Anyway. Here’s my question, and you’re going to think it’s a joke but it’s not. I’m completely serious, because for me this moment was like a warehouse light getting switched on, revealing aisle after aisle of potential, and I realized: “Computers. We are going to do stuff with these.”
Hitman Needs Absolution (But Not This One)
Agent 47’s latest attempt at finagling some absolution.
I know the last ten days have been hard without Space-Biff! updates to brighten the gloominess and despair of December, so rest assured that we here at the Space-Shanty have been filling all our spare time brainstorming radical new journalistic styles for your perusing pleasure. We know you’ll appreciate the result — a series of rapid-fire, low-quality articles to catch us up on all the stuff we were planning to talk about but didn’t have time to! Huzzah! And first on the list is Hitman: Absolution! Short version: it’s not only nothing special, it’s actively bad. Kidding! It’s incredible!
Summoner Wars: Divine Intervention
The beginning setup: Vanguards versus Tundra Orcs.
Back in October I decided to roll the dice in the official Summoner Wars iOS Tournament and prove myself the premier Summoner Wars player of all time. Turns out I’m not. Even so, I did a lot better than I assumed I would, coming this close to making it into the third round (of four, in case you were wondering). I took screenshots of most of my games, and meant to do a massive post-tournament writeup, but certain constraints (like not winning) kept me from it.
Well, I figure I can talk about a couple of the games though, considering I have all these hundreds of screenshots. The first match is a win from the first round — it’s actually the win that placed me at 3-2 in my division, and going on to the second. It’s an epic win, full of tense moments and nick-of-time maneuvers. At no less than two points I nearly hurled my iPad across the room, and was only constrained by the damnable fragility of the thing. But. Despite the thrills this match offers, this isn’t an example of how to play Summoner Wars well. Not in the slightest.
SPACE-BIFF! 