A Plaguebearer in Skyrim: The Epiphany
The base of Northwind Summit, rumored nest of a dragon.
(Before reading, you should read the first part of our heroes’ adventures. It’s right here.)
Illia continues to be worried about Innohunk as they near Northwind Summit, the northernmost peak in the Rift. It is a lawless region, barely overseen by its jarl in the capital of Riften. It is populated with bears, wolves, bandits, and, if the rumors prove true (they almost always do in Tamriel), dragons. If anything ill should befall them, there will be no help, as nearest civilization is either the unprotected mining camp of Darkwater Crossing on the river to the west, or the city of Windhelm across miles of desolate marshes to the north. That is to say, only weeks ago Innohunk would have been reveling in the danger of their quest. Today he is as gloomy as the Northwind mountains.
Illia has had a witchly premonition (though she quietly disclaims that she is not a witch, not anymore) that the source of Innohunk’s bleak mood will be revealed this very day. The anticipation is killing her.
Christmas, Occupied
After years of not being played with, my old Star Wars toys were sick of the annual use that the Christmas crowd was getting. They’ve taken matters into their own hands. Take that, ornament fat cats!
They're as mad as hell, and they're not going to take this anymore.
Disclaimer: This is what I did with my sister while everyone else was dipping chocolates. This isn’t meant as a statement of political alignment, etc, etc.
More pics after the jump, and of course, you are permitted to click any of the pics for embiggening.
A Plaguebearer in Skyrim: Meet the Dragonborn
Innohunk is so heroic, he blacksmiths in plate. Doesn't even feel the heat.
Meet Innohunk.
Innohunk is the Dovahkiin, or Dragonborn. This means he’s got a capital-d Destiny. As such, he’s one of the most talented men in all of Skyrim — nay, all of Tamriel! Everyone wants him to solve their problems. Women want a peek of what’s under his mail skirt, and men want to die by his side. He’s amassed so much treasure that his eventual barrow will be looted for centuries to come. Basically, he’s got everything a red-blooded Nord man could ask for.
So why does Innohunk look so sad?
Rage: The Monocular
Back when I quasi-reviewed Rage, I was going to write another pair of articles. These articles would be lists, formatted along the lines of “The 5 Things Rage Got Right” and “The 5 Things Rage Got Wrong.” Very cleverly, I was planning on writing that the number one thing that id got both right and wrong was the game engine, id Tech 5. I know, herp de derp.
It’s been a great week for game releases, what with both Skyrim and Saints Row: The Third coming out and flustering my time management. Both are so immense that I doubt I’ll be able to do them justice anytime soon. So I sat down to make a little filler article. To keep up the habit, you see. I figured I’d talk about a few of my criticisms of Rage that I left unvoiced back in October.
Then I got completely sidetracked, and found myself wearing strange clothes and feeling not quite myself.
Mansions of Madness: Blood Ties (Part 3)
Last time on Mansions of Madness: Blood Ties...
That is not dead which can eternal lie,
and with strange aeons even death may die.
— H.P. Lovecraft, “The Call of Cthulhu”
When last we saw our investigators, things weren’t going well. You should read all about that before continuing on (Part 1, Part 2) . “Ashcan” Pete’s uncle Artimus has made some sort of black bargain, and now that he’s died it’s blowing back Ashcan’s way (“Just my luck,” he mutters repeatedly), who is now trapped between a mi-go and a zombie. Professor Harvey Walters has contracted an otherworldly case of kleptomania. Kate Winthrop and Sister Mary were ambushed by a very suspiciously quiet zombie, and now they’re hiding out in the house at the north of Artimus’ estate.
Is this the end for our ragged band?
Mansions of Madness: Blood Ties (Part 2)
Our four investigators, searching the Artimus Estate for clues.
West of Arkham the hills rise wild, and there are valleys with deep woods that no axe has ever cut.
— H.P. Lovecraft, “The Colour Out of Space”
When we last saw our intrepid investigators, they were about to begin their adventure. Such suspense! This time, we’ll definitely get to see some actual adventuring as they investigate the estate of “Ashcan” Pete’s deceased uncle, who was quite strange. Before continuing, you should probably read Part 1.
Mansions of Madness: Blood Ties (Part 1)
The "Blood Ties" map, complete with starting setup cards.
The most merciful thing in the world, I think, is the inability of the human mind to correlate all its contents.
— H.P. Lovecraft, “The Call of Cthulhu”
Mansions of Madness by Fantasy Flight Games is about an ancient conflict, between incomprehensible things and a few ignorant people willing to peer into the unknown, and in the process push back the darkness for a few minutes more or lose their sanity. It takes place in the thick of Lovecraft’s (and his inheritors’) fiction, in a vast universe hostile, or perhaps worse, indifferent, to man.
I sat down on Halloween night with my wife, my sister Emilie, and two friends to play through one of the game’s scenarios, “Blood Ties.” This is the story of what befell four investigators as they struggled to uncover the mystery of a blood relative, and the legacy he may have passed on…
GLaDOS is a Vegetable, The Sequel
You know how it goes. You think you’re okay to go to that party. You know, the one that might be a bit too hardcore for you. Then you wake up as a vegetable. GLaDOS knows the feeling. And now it’s happened again. You’d think she’d learn.
The GLaDOS pumpkin, courtesy of my wife. She was going to carve Manny Calavera too, but that pumpkin fell off the table after being hollowed out.
Go ahead, click for a bigger image. And after the jump, a bonus pic…
The Most Frightening Game of the Year
Tabajaras says goodbye to his grandparents for the last time. Is this the most frightening part of the year? Tragically, no.
Last night was Halloween. This would have been posted then, but I sat down with a group of friends to play Mansions of Madness instead. So here’s Space-Biff’s first ever (belated) Halloween special.
I’d like to talk a bit about the game that’s frightened me the most this year. You may have already guessed what it is from the image above. If you have, you’re probably wondering how anyone could consider this game frightening. If you haven’t, a hint: it isn’t called “Nuevos Aires, 1960.” It’s a game that at its most profound level is about the detachment and numbness that follows real violence, about confronting impossible atrocities, and about a nation’s disconnect between the suffering of its people and the isolation — and ambitions — of its leaders. It’s also a puzzle game. About zombies. And smashing them to their constituent atoms.
RPS Ascension: Annum Belli Apparatum (Spring and Summer, Year 2)
Ichiro is feeling good about himself, for the first time he can remember since he joined the Demon Priesthood. There is peace between Wayland of the Marverni tribes and Akenbei of the Yomi, and the dominion of Akenbei is secure all along the coast thanks to Ichiro’s temples. So he’s mortified, naturally, to learn that Akenbei intends to invade the Marverni lands so soon after an agreement has been made.
The situation in the southern half of the western landmass of Antopeos
Ichiro sees some problems with Akenbei’s plan. First, there is no guarantee that Raidon’s army will be able to survive an attack on Bogger Wold after the army has been worn out by months of combat. Second, when the forces of the Yomi are compared to that of the Marverni, it is apparent that there are three Marverni soldiers to every Yomi currently fielded. Third — and most importantly — Ichiro has been left without any attendant army in Roca while Akenbei and Raidon have camped their forces in Temiglia. If they invade Bogger Wold, the inevitable reprisal from Marverni will likely consist of their army in Diluphe marching north to where Ichiro is stationed, burning and plundering everything in their path. Ichiro’s good mood simply won’t abide this possibility.
SPACE-BIFF! 