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It’s About Building an Island Fortress

FORCING OTHERS TO DIE BUILDING A FORTRESS ON TOP OF A HILL ON AN ISLAND: THE GAME is about the only possible blunter title.

Island Fortress strikes me as a deeply silly title for a boardgame. So matter-of-fact. No mystery to it. It’s kind of like naming Archipelago, I dunno, “Unethical Caribbean Colony” or something. Or calling Netrunner “Corporate Hacking.” I’m not sure why it strikes me as so unusually stolid when there are plenty of poorly-named games games out there, but whenever I look at the box, I hear an accountant telling me, in the flattest voice possible, “We are now going to begin constructing an island fortress.” Then he starts eating all the crackers and talking about his favorite equity funds.

Thank goodness I don’t judge books by their covers unless they’re romance novels, because otherwise I would have never learned that Island Fortress is the best time you’ll ever have sending dozens of people to their deaths so that you can play Tetris.

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