Blog Archives
Hordes of Tiny-Omen
One of the things that always stands out about John Clowdus’s designs is just how much gameplay he packs into a tiny package. As it should be — after all, his guiding principle is written right into the name of his company, a manifesto laid bare for all to see. These may be Small Box Games, but that doesn’t mean they should be inconsequential.
And for the most part, Hordes of Grimoor makes good on that tradition.
Hold Your Breath and Count to Ten
What’s the difference between a Skyfall, a Spyfall, a Seafall, and a Soulfall?
No really, I’m asking. I don’t even get it. After about ten seconds, my brain morphs that sequence of words into mush. Then again, maybe it’s just me trying to parse how I feel about Soulfall.
Raiding the Troll Hole
I’ve never thought of a “Troll Hole” as anything other than the seedy dance bar on the north side of the city. Now, thanks to Oink Games — the same company that gave us the tiny-but-sublime Deep Sea Adventure and A Fake Artist Goes to New York — the phrase has taken on a far gentler meaning. As in, a humid, stinky, and pitch-black earthen hole where a troll stashes its jewels. And it’s my task to steal as many as I can before the troll figures out what’s afoot and beats me silly with my own leg.
Streets Slick with Neon and Lies
Until last Friday, I’d always wanted to visit Hong Kong. Then there were four totally unrelated murders within an hour of each other. One of them went unsolved. The other three had all been carried out by police officers.
Yikes.
Pandemic: Spoiled Friendships
According to the Surgeon General, spoilers can be bad for you, and may cause mood swings, irrationality, sleepless nights, and “getting bent out of shape.” Soon after issuing this warning, the Surgeon General fired her undersecretary for putting such a frivolous motion across her desk. Personally, we think the Surgeon General can stuff it, so what follows is part three of our series to demystify everything about Pandemic Legacy. Our only warning is to take care that you’re caught up on part one and part two before reading further!
EVEN SO, BE WARNED THAT THERE ARE MANY SPOILERS HERE. PARTAKE AT YOUR OWN RISK. SPACE-BIFF! WILL NOT REIMBURSE YOU FOR HURT FEELINGS OR BENT-OUT-OF-SHAPENESS.
Posthummus
It’s the nature of children to kill their parents. I’ve come to terms with this, which is why Baby Cate has already received the best firearms, outdoor survival, and martial arts training available to two-year-olds. For a premium, anything is possible. And when the time comes, I’ll put up a noble fight.
Which is perhaps why Posthuman stands out in spite of itself.
Empires: Age of Taking Stuff
Our modern sensibilities may protest all they like, but it’s a fact of human nature that we as a species absolutely love the prospect of racing headlong into the unknown, finding people dissimilar to ourselves, and swiping all their stuff. And Empires: Age of Discovery, the spiritual reincarnation (and license sidestep) of Glen Drover’s 2007 board game Age of Empires III: The Age of Discovery, understands this fact deep down in the pit of its belly.
The Dice Must Flow
While other pubescent boys were discovering their interest in girls, my heart was occupied by Dune. Without reservation, it was my favorite book between the ages of fourteen and eighteen. Too bad about most of the sequels, not to mention every attempt to translate onto the big screen.
A couple months ago, the first time Dune: The Dice Game (also known by its much cooler nickname The Dice Must Flow) hit my table, a newcomer to our group announced that he’d never read Frank Herbert’s 1965 masterpiece. Somewhat interrupting my explanation of the rules, he asked, “So what’s it about?”
There’s a chance I was a bit curt in my response. I think I mumbled something about Lawrence of Arabia and went back to explaining how to play. Because anyway, what is Dune about? There are any number of things I could have said. It’s about the allure and danger of messiahs and heroes. About addiction to a dwindling resource. About the decline of the status quo, about revolution, about religion’s role in both. The transformative nature of knowledge, violence, sex. It’s about finding yourself and realizing you’ve lost yourself in the process.
Or maybe those are just the memory of my teenage hormones talking. Lots of things seem double-plus profound when your pituitary gland has declared war on the rest of your body.
Elsewhere: Raid & Trade
It isn’t often that I play truly terrible games. For the most part, my personal filter has seen enough use that it strains out the turds before they ever land on my table, like a sieve umbrella that keeps my hat smear-free. Also in this metaphor, it rains poo.
Unfortunately, every so often a wet one trumpets through the net. This time it was Raid & Trade, one of the dullest games that has ever besotted my living room. My review can be found over at Miniature Market’s Review Corner. It’s perhaps my most openly negative critique in a long time — frankly, I’m surprised they agreed to publish it. If you do take a look, take note of the unintentional hilarity to be found after the article’s conclusion.
Best Week 2015: The Index
Once again that sad moment is upon us. Best Week 2015 is over, leaving us with nothing to do but say goodbye. Below are links to each day’s catalog of the best games of the year. Just click any of the pics to be magically whisked away to the correct list. Until 2016’s compilation, take care of yourselves!
SPACE-BIFF! 